“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved.” (Ephesians 1:3-6 NKJV)
At some point in our lives each of us will experience the feeling of rejection. When something negative is said about us over and over again, we begin to believe what is said. We begin to base our self-worth on those words, those opinions of others, rather than on the truth of what God says. We begin to give more weight to human words than to the words God speaks. Our feelings and actions follow what we believe, so our self-image reflects this. God calls out to us, “I have spread out My hands all the day long to a rebellious people, who walk in a way that is not good, after their own thought.“ (Isaiah 65:2 KJV)
Jesus understands our feelings of rejection. In fact, it is his experience of ultimate rejection, through death on the cross, which actually brings us eternal acceptance. He was without sin and became sin for us bearing our sin, our shame, and our feelings of worthlessness and abandonment. Jesus was rejected so we could be accepted.
“You were once far away from God. You were his enemies, separated from him by your evil thoughts and actions, yet now he has brought you back as his friends. He has done this through his death on the cross in his own human body. As a result, he has brought you into the very presence of God and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault. But you must continue to believe this truth and stand in it firmly. Don’t drift away from the assurance you received when you heard the Good News.” (Colossians 1:21-23 NLT)
Jesus died in our place in order that we might enter into an unbroken relationship with our loving Heavenly Father. God’s eternal acceptance of us was purchased through Jesus’ death and resurrection assuring us of our place forever, holy and blameless, in the presence of our loving God. Through Jesus we truly are “accepted in the beloved.”
There are three feelings humans must have in order to be healthy. They are: 1) I belong; 2) I have worth; 3) I am adequate and/or competent. Feelings of rejection say the opposite of each of these.
I BELONG: God’s sacrifice of His only Son for us, clearly speaks of how precious and valuable we are to Him. The death and resurrection of Jesus forever guarantees our acceptance by God. When we choose to make Jesus Lord of our lives, God acknowledges us as His children. “But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God.” (John 1:12 NLT) God is our Father. We are His cherished children. We belong.
I HAVE WORTH: We have worth because God created and cares for us. We are precious in His sight. Regardless of what others tell us, God’s word proclaims we have worth. That’s what counts! “Make sure no outsider who now follows God ever has occasion to say, ‘God put me in second-class. I don’t really belong.’ And make sure no physically mutilated person is ever made to think, ‘I’m damaged goods. I don’t really belong.’” (Isaiah 56:3 MSG) We are HIS workmanship and HE is a skilled craftsman.
I AM ADEQUATE/COMPETENT: We are so much more than what is noticed on the skin surface of our lives. At the deepest place of our being God speaks truth. In order to belong, have worth, and experience competence, we need simply to believe and affirm what God says. Believing is a choice. Growing confident as one who is “accepted in the beloved” is the result of consciously speaking truth to our own soul until our emotions agree. God has already established our worth and our place in His heart forever. Through Jesus this is done. We belong. We are accepted.
As we settle into this wonderful new reality we come to experience that we are more capable than we ever thought possible. With the Holy Spirit living inside of us, we have the power to accomplish whatever God calls us to do. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13 NKJV) The world is wrong when it says we don’t matter or that we are worthless. We are priceless! We are so valuable to God, that He wants us to live with Him forever. This is what He says: “Can a woman forget her nursing child? Can she have no pity on the son to whom she gave birth? Even these may forget, but I will not forget you. See, I have marked your names on My hands. Your walls are always before Me.” (Isaiah 49:15-16 NLT)
How can we deal with feelings of rejection? First, identify them. Then, even as we experience the feelings to the point where they seem to be overpowering us, we choose to reject them, based on what God says. Finally, we replace the thoughts by affirming healing truth such as: “God I thank you I am unconditionally loved. I am completely forgiven. I am precious in your sight. I am complete in Christ.”
God says that we are unconditionally loved and very precious. God doesn’t lie. God never leaves or forsakes His children. He will forever carry them close to His heart. To grow in grace and the knowledge of our position in Christ we need to: acknowledge we are fully accepted by Him; receive His forgiveness for our sins; embrace the love He freely gives; believe His word spoken over us is truth. The Bible tells us we are complete in Christ. Satisfaction with ourselves and all we do in life is a gift from God. Our searching for acceptance and belonging finds contentment only when we enter into a loving, eternal relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ.
Questions For Reflection and Discussion
- When I feel rejection, how do I cope with it?
- How do I reject myself? (What do I think and say about myself?)
- How does knowing and believing “I’m accepted in the beloved” impact my life and who I truly am?