Twelve Steps Of A.a. Step Nine Healing Broken Relationships (2)
Wednesday November 4, 2015
Audio for TWELVE STEPS OF A.A. - STEP NINE - HEALING BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS (2)
It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’ (Matthew 4:4 NIV)
Yesterday we began looking at a process for establishing and living in restored relationships according to God’s plan. Today we look at two more steps in this process.
GIVE UP UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS OF OTHERS: We continue the process of healing broken relationships as we give up the expectation that others must appreciate, accept and care for us. Such care would be nice to experience and we need to continue, with God's help, to seek this type of safe and caring relationship with a healthy person. However, we will never find full peace of mind and heart from another person and will continue to live in ongoing frustration if we carry this kind of unrealistic expectation into a relationship. Healthy relationships will only happen when we stop seeking to build the relationship based on our needs. God’s way is that we come together with others to first bless and share God's goodness. As God generously gives to us, we will be able to give to others without expectation, and surprisingly, we will in turn, receive blessings from others in return.
See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him. Dear friends, we are already God’s children, but he has not yet shown us what we will be like when Christ appears. But we do know that we will be like him, for we will see him as he really is. And all who have this eager expectation will keep themselves pure, just as he is pure. (1 John 3:1-3 NLT)
IDENTIFY AN APPROPRIATE LEVEL OF INTERACTION: A healthy circle of relationships includes a number of different levels of sharing and interaction. We have acquaintances with whom we simply “meet and greet”, casual friends with whom we share some events and meetings, closer friends with whom we may share the issues of our hearts and perhaps have some mutual support, wise persons we may seek out for counsel, and maybe just one or two persons who may be our spouse or perhaps a life-long friend with whom we share the deepest things of our heart. We often bring problems into a relationship when we expect a person to provide a level of support and care that is more than what that relationship is intended to bring. With God’s guidance and perhaps the help of a wise person, we can experience peace and give thanks for each relationship as we recognize, honour, and allow that relationship to simply be what God intended.
My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. (John 15:12 NIV)
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